Analysing a Train Wreck
by SamCyberCat
Summary: Maxie didn't know if he could truly know his feelings, but a growing chain of mistakes was the best evidence he was going to get. ORAS Maxie/Archie.


**Notes:** Written for SmudDragon, who gave me the prompt "I think I love you and I'm terrified". This is set years before the events of ORAS, based on a line of dialogue in the game that says Archie and Maxie previously worked in a team together.

* * *

I'm in love with you.

It should have been a simple enough thing to say, supposedly. Maxie assumed that countless people said this every day. But then... perhaps he was rushing into that assumption as much as other people rushed into saying those words.

He'd always been more analytical than instinctive and would quietly sneer at those who rushed into saying such things. There were people he'd come to know (through circumstance, very definitely not through choice) who would say they loved each other after only weeks of dating. To Maxie, this felt kind of desperate. So desperate for a relationship to work that it would crumble apart quickly, due to the fragile base it had been built upon.

So surely he was not the only person who had stopped to realise how stupid it was to rush in like that. There must be a lot of people, sensible people like him, who took their time about such matters. And what he should take away from such a conclusion was that he shouldn't rush. He shouldn't just blurt out his feelings to Archie. He should wait.

* * *

I think I'm in love with you.

Because Maxie was the sort of person who assessed and reassessed everything until the lines blurred so badly that no true conclusion could be reached. Certainly he had conviction in his actions, because people didn't take you seriously if they sensed even the slightest hesitation, but behind his conviction was wave upon wave of doubt.

And unfortunately this rang true for... whatever it was that he had with Archie.

A few years ago he'd been completely convinced that he was in love with Archie. But so much had happened since then. And he didn't just mean the unforgettable nights. There had been... rules and restrictions. Lines that they'd had to follow. They'd both been good about keeping to these rules in public and covering their tracks so no one would learn what they did in their free time.

But it wasn't the sneaking around that had cast doubt on Maxie's feelings in his own mind. More accurately, it was himself. Because he saw how people who were in love with each other acted and he... didn't act that way. He knew that whatever feelings he had for Archie were genuine, but at the same time he still found himself being just as analytical about their relationship as he was with everything else in his life. Which wasn't how this was supposed to work, apparently.

He had sneered at those impulsive couples who rushed into showing their feelings for each other, but as time went on he realised that even the longest enduring relationships had some kind of instinctive nature to them. Which was something he lacked. He didn't have that feeling in his gut or his heart that other people claimed to be so important when it came to love. All of Maxie's notions on the matter came from his head.

So sadly had had to accept that although he wanted to be in love with Archie, until he could further understand how all this worked he had to resign to merely thinking he was in love with him.

* * *

I think I'm in love with you and I'm terrified.

Working like this was never going to last forever.

When they'd first joined their team, two naïve youths eager to change the world, their passions had been what brought them together in more ways than one. It hadn't only been the intensity of their romance, it had also been the intensity of them. Because finally they both had someone else who cared just as much as each other did about changing the world. Maxie remembered those long nights when they'd sit up talking excitedly about how they were going to make a difference and remembered how drawn into it he'd been at the start.

It was just unfortunate that his brain wouldn't leave him alone during these discussions. It was inevitable when two people spent as much time together as they did. At first they'd believed themselves to be on the same page about everything. But as time went on, Maxie quietly started to doubt this. They were maybe a couple of pages apart. Which later led to being chapters apart.

And at this point, Maxie didn't think they were even in the same book.

The team they belonged to was falling apart. Everyone had different ideas about the right ways to change the world, with Archie and Maxie being no exception to that.

It was just a shame that their feelings on the matter didn't match each other's either.

* * *

I think I'm in love with you and I'm terrified. Also, I'm leaving.

Neither of them were surprised when it finally happened. It was Maxie who walked from the team first, but he had no doubt that Archie soon would as well. There was nothing left there for either of them and no point in hanging around this sinking ship when they both had the potential to bring their aims into new teams. Ones that would believe in their causes and be more focused than this sprawling mess was.

...Unfortunately, exactly the same could be said of their relationship.

They didn't officially end it in the same way that they hadn't officially started it way back at the beginning. But they both knew that it was over. It had been a long time coming anyway, so putting it off any further would be wrong.

When Maxie left he did so in the middle of the night, purposely not wanting to even give Archie the chance to see him off. Because if they talked one more time then they'd just talk each other out of it one more time and he couldn't bear that. Not any more.

Yet still, as he walked away from the building he looked back. And this had been a mistake. Archie stood there at the doorway watching him go. They were to blame in equal parts, as usual. Maxie had left without telling Archie he was going, but Archie also didn't try to stop Maxie from leaving, even though he knew he would do this eventually.

When it came to the two of them, they were always both in the wrong and that was why it had to end.

* * *

I hate you.

I think I hate you.

I think I hate you and I'm terrified.

I think I hate you and I'm terrified. Also, I'm coming back.

It had been years now. Maxie had a new team, a new resolve and was on the way to obtaining everything that he'd set out to achieve when he'd walked away that night. Team Magma should have been what he'd aimed for from the very start, but he'd been too young and stupid to know better back in those days.

Not any more though. Because now Maxie knew that all of his analysing and self-doubt was what made him stronger. He was second-guessing himself before any opponent could even begin to try and out-think him. Which meant that he could come up with plans, counter-plans for those plans and then how to counter those counter-plans. He was unstoppable.

So when he heard word of Team Aqua and their idiotic ideas, he just smiled to himself, already knowing who was behind them. Because who else could it be?

Yes, perhaps he was scared of what had long since been left behind resurfacing once again, but he was also a stronger person now. Much stronger than the foolishly compassionate Archie.

He would come back to Archie. Then he would step down on him, crush him beneath his boot and prove to him for the last time that he was right. About the what was good for the world, about how wrong they'd been together, about... just everything.

Upon reaching that conclusion, Maxie realised that he'd probably never been in love with Archie after all.

...Only he hadn't expected knowing that to hurt as hard as it did.


End file.
